


Where No Man - Redux

by Erin_Riwen



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Where No Man - Redux
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-17 23:32:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14841309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Erin_Riwen/pseuds/Erin_Riwen
Summary: Written for Archmonkey on LJ in 2010Prompt: I was thinking- TOS story line with STXI characters. On an away mission, Their love is still a secret to everyone but the two of them, a little drama and comfort (like how Spock comforts Kirk in "The Apple"), but happy end like the show.





	Where No Man - Redux

_First Officer's log, Star date 2258.82  
The Enterprise has been issued her first assignment as a commissioned vessel under her new Captain. Despite an impressive number of transfer requests from seasoned officers, Captain Kirk has retained the majority of the crew that served under him during the Nero Incident. The logic of having a largely inexperienced crew is being questioned at the highest levels of Starfleet. Given the Captain’s current hero status, he has been granted his request. However, as a precaution the Enterprise has been assigned a Psychology expert, Dr. Elizabeth Dehner, to evaluate the mental health of the crew and to determine if we are functioning effectively. Since her arrival, Dr. Dehner has been meeting with crew members in thirty minute intervals; the appointment she has set up with me is for two hours. Given the nature of her profession and in light of recent events, I am disinclined to believe that this extended meeting is due to my position as first officer._

Spock stood outside the office assigned to doctor Dehner wishing he could refuse this 'conversation'. The concept of sharing ones private thoughts with a complete stranger was an uncomfortable one and something he saw no value in. Discussion of what was did not change the truth of its existence. 'It is Illogical to wish for what was not possible' he told himself, though a part of him knew it was true nonetheless. He was under orders to be here and he would obey, but no one could compel him to discuss things that were best kept private. With a deep breath and a final tug on his blue uniform shirt, Spock palmed the buzzer.

"Mr. Spock, punctual as expected," the doctor said, indicating a chair across the desk from her.

"Doctor Dehner," Spock said.

"Would you like something before we start? Tea perhaps?"

"No, thank you," Spock replied, not wishing to prolong this meeting any longer than was necessary.

"Very well. Let's get started, shall we?"

As Spock knew this to be a rhetorical question, he inclined his head and waited. He was determined this woman would learn nothing he did not wish her to know.

Dr. Dehner cleared her throat, sipped her coffee and then laced her fingers together in front of her on the desk. "I am certain, Mr. Spock, that you are aware of why I am here." Without waiting for an answer, she continued. "There are several topics that I need to discuss with you.  
The loss of your planet, your mother, your betrothed, the trauma of the fight with Nero, your issues with Captain Kirk..."

"I have no issues with Captain Kirk," Spock interrupted before he realized he had done so. He clamped his mouth closed again.

The doctor smiled, no doubt attempting to put Spock at ease. His spine snapped even straighter. "You marooned him on Delta Vega and then accosted him, some reports say you were trying to kill him. I would call those issues." 

Put that way Spock had to admit that there was every reason to believe that he would have issues towards his captain. Strange that he had not considered this before. He thought back to his interactions with Kirk. It was not a pleasant experience. To admit to his loss of control, his compromised state of mind, was painful. Yet he had never once considered the possibility of holding onto the negative emotions. Was that the Vulcan side of him working to suppress his emotions? Perhaps. And yet he could not remember dealing with any negative emotions concerning his captain beyond those that had been the impetus for the actions the Doctor had just described. Returning to the bridge after his attack on Kirk, Spock had felt nothing for the captain but interest in his plans, admiration for his determination and admittedly a mild annoyance at his illogical attitude. But the hostile feelings of rage and pain were firmly directed where they belonged, at Nero, and had never again surfaced towards Kirk. 

The strangest was Kirk’s behavior. Despite the physical attack, Kirk never flinched in his presence, or avoided his touch. Despite everything between them, Kirk had trusted Spock to come with him to destroy Nero and save Captain Pike. At no point had Kirk made Spock feel like he held any grievance against him. It was why he had been able to walk back on the bridge, asking to be allowed to rejoin the crew. He was certain that he would not be refused.

Spock refocused on Dr. Dehner. He reluctantly admired her patience as she sat quietly, waiting for him to work all of this out. If nothing else came out of this, he had to admit that the meeting had been of value for the moment of insight it had provided.

“Spock?” Dehner prompted. She was waiting for him to share whatever epiphany he had just unraveled, but that was not going to happen. These insights needed to be shared, but not with her.

“I assure you, Doctor. Despite everything that has occurred between us there are no issues that need to be addressed between the captain and myself.” She would have to be satisfied with that.

"Spock, you just sat here for several minutes thinking intently about something," the doctor pointed out. "What caused that reaction?"

Spock wanted to leave, but he had been ordered to cooperate. A soft sigh passed unbidden past his pursed lips and the young officer noted that he was in need of a large degree of meditation as soon as possible. Looking directly at the doctor, his voice impassive once more, Spock responded. "Captain Kirk has expressed no dissatisfaction with my work and I have none with his. There are no further problems between us. There is nothing more to discuss on the matter." 

"It is never as simple as that, Mr. Spock," the doctor said still pushing. She stood, turned to face the painting behind her desk. ''There is always more to the story than that."

"I assure you that in this case, it is indeed that simple," Spock said firmly. "It is done."

Turning back around to face her patient again, Dr. Dehner continued. "Your planet was destroyed, the only home you have ever known is no more. Surely there are unsettled feelings associated with that event. Anger, rage, sorrow? It destroyed your home, your mother, your betrothed. That is a lot of loss for anyone, but for one so young it is catastrophic. Would you have me believe that you have settled all of this in just these few short months, alone?"

Spock repeated a mantra in his mind, keeping his emotions at bay and fighting the urge to simply leave before he gave another indication of what he kept hidden before this stranger. "Doctor," Spock said, taking a deep breath, "Of course these events are catastrophic. To indicate otherwise would be foolish and not just for the 'young' as you put it. All remaining Vulcans suffer from the loss. However, we are trained from an early age to process and control these emotions and I am controlling mine, as is the rest of my race." 

Before Spock could continue, the door buzzer rang and the doctor opened it. Captain Kirk entered the office and Spock almost sagged in relief at the beguiling smile offered to the doctor. He knew that smile. Kirk was up to something and Spock was not at all surprised his request. "Doctor, my deepest apologies for interrupting, but I need Mr. Spock. It is important or I wouldn't barge in. I hope you'll be able to let me 'borrow' him for a bit."

The doctor's eyes narrowed slightly, but she seemed to decide against questioning the Captain's integrity. She gave a nod, then looked at Spock. "Mr. Spock, we are not finished."

Spock looked at his Captain, his friend, then at the Doctor. "Doctor, you may indeed wish to see me again, but I can assure you that there is very little else I have to share with you. Losing my home, my mother, my betrothed are all my personal pain and I am quite capable of seeing to my own issues. Also, you speak as if you know me, are aware of who I am but I would offer that you are mistaken, greatly mistaken. If you truly knew me, then you would understand that I am not alone. I did not suffer loss alone but share that with many. I also do not process my personal issues alone. I still have my father, my mentor, and my friends. I have no further need for assistance but I offer gratitude for your concern. Captain," Spock said, turning his eyes toward his friend, "I am at your disposal."

With a nod toward Spock and a final nod and grin at the doctor from the Captain, the pair left the office and started down the corridor.  
The pair walked side by side toward the turbolift. Spock wondered to himself at the ease with which the two of them have put the past behind them and had deep the familiarity had developed between them. He knew there was no pressing issue that had caused his Captain to pull him from his meeting with the Doctor. Just as he knew that by asking "Captain, what pressing issue came up that made you require my assistance?" with his eyebrow lifted that his captain would know he was teasing.

Kirk laughed out loud and gave one of his rather intriguing hand gestures that could literally mean anything. Spock followed Kirk towards his quarters, now more than a little confused. When they entered, Kirk ordered the temperature a few degrees higher, a courtesy that Spock appreciated.

"Tea, Spock?" Kirk asked as he walked over to the replicator and punched up hazelnut coffee with cream.

"Yes, thank you Cap..Jim," Spock said, correcting the title as Kirk had requested he do in private. Spock took the steaming mug that Jim handed him and took his customary seat at the desk where they often played chess. The blended scents of the Rooibos tea that Spock favored and the hazelnut coffee that was Jim's favorite filled the rooms and Spock relaxed back into the chair. "So, Jim, what did you need my assistance with? You managed the coffee retrieval most efficiently."

Kirk laughed, then spread his hands out in front of him with a shrug of his shoulders. "I'm...restless, and it's the duty of my first officer to - help." 

The bright grin that accompanied the comment caused a slight tug on Spock's heart, though he would not admit it, even to himself.  
"You are worried about the mission," Spock said quietly. "How can I assist you? I have no additional information to add to what I provided this morning at the briefing."

"You can help me work off this excess energy," Jim said, wiggling his eyebrows with a leering grin. "Chess?"

************************************

“Your move, Captain.”

Kirk continued to stare off into space rather than at the chess board. His fingers were drumming erratically on the table top and the periodic glances at the chronometer showed that his mind was not on the game. “We should have intercepted it by now. The Bridge said they'd call.” Jim tossed back the last of his third cup of coffee, his body nearly vibrating with anxiety.

Spock leaned back in his chair, watching the Captain closely. He knew Kirk well enough to know that the young Captain did not take inactivity well and unsolved mysteries even less so. Spock restrained himself from explaining why questioning the efficiency of the bridge crew that Kirk had handpicked was illogical. “I shall have you checkmated your next move," he said, in another attempt to grab Jim's attention.

Kirk glanced briefly at the board and then up at Spock. “Have I ever mentioned you play a very irritating game of chess, Spock? “

“That emotion in regards to me seems to come up with great frequency in our conversations. Am I to understand that you no longer wish to engage in our games?” Spock spoke, allowing the growing fondness for Jim to seep through and hoping it would distract his friend.

“No, Spock. Being annoyed with you is half the fun. “ Even that statement was said half-heartedly and Kirk's eyes stayed locked on the comm unit as though by will alone he could make the call come.

“As illogical as that statement is, normally I would accept it as being true. However, your current inability to focus on anything besides the object we are tracking belies the notion that you are enjoying yourself.”

Kirk was staring at the chronometer again. “Could we have missed it?”

It was quite obvious that Kirk was hardly even noticing him in the room and Spock began to wonder why Jim had really requested his company. To his mind, his presence had done nothing to calm the Captain. Spock began to put the chess pieces away and almost had the 3D board cleared before Kirk noticed.

"Is the game over? Who won?”

“It was a stalemate.” Spock could not hide the irony in his voice. 

Kirk missed it anyway. “It’s been awhile since we tied. Do you want to play another?”

“No, Jim. That would be a waste of energy, as your mind is not on the game." Spock was not accusatory, simply stating facts. "Perhaps it would be best if I go to the bridge and check on the progress of the unknown object we are tracking. Would you care to accompany me?” The question was largely rhetorical - it was clear that was where Jim wanted to be.

Kirk leapt to his feet in eager compliance before he stopped and turned, digging his fingers into the table. “I really shouldn’t hover over Beta crew. They'll get the feeling I don’t trust them.”

Spock finished putting the last piece away and rose. He clasped his hands behind his back in his normal stance and watched Jim's internal struggle so clear on his face. Moments like this that reminded him why he had chosen to serve as first officer under this man. Though Kirk was impulsive and brash and many other illogical things, the crew’s welfare always came first with him. The brilliant blue eyes locked onto Spock's and it seemed that something he saw in Spock's face made him smile, though he said nothing.

************************************

“Bridge to Captain Kirk,” Kelso’s voice came over the comm.

Kirk moved so fast that Spock almost missed it. “Kirk here,” the young Captain's voice replied, slightly higher and sharper than normal.  
“Captain, the object is now within tractor beam range.“

“Visual contact?

“No, sir. It's too small. Only one meter in diameter.”

Spock moved over to stand by Kirk. He knew his presence usually helped Jim remain calm, though he was not certain why that was true. It had not worked as well tonight as it normally did, but Spock would provide whatever help he could to his Captain. 

“Not large enough even for an escape pod. “

“Small enough to bring it aboard, sir, if you want to risk it.” Kelso offered.

Kirk looked up at Spock. "There are obvious risks with such a plan, but the scans we have performed should have caught anything life threatening," Spock responded, offering what little information he could and whatever assurance that provided.

Kirk nodded his agreement. “Lock onto it, Mister Kelso.”

************************************

Mr. Scott was leaned over the blackened object when Spock and Kirk arrived.

"Scotty?" Kirk asked as he squatted down next to him.

"It's an old-style ship recorder, Sir, from the S.S. Valiant from two hundred years ago. No doubt it was ejected when something threatened the ship."

"More likely destroyed in this case given its burnt and pitted state." Spock said.

"Let's hope the tapes are intact." Kirk said. 

The outer casing was a mess. Scotty had to use a localized laser to crack into it while Spock tracked his progress with the scanner.  
Kirk went to the wall com. "Kirk to bridge."

"Randall here, sir."

"Lieutenant put the ship on Yellow Alert. Spock and I will be up shortly."

"Understood."

Spock raised an eyebrow and Kirk shrugged. "It's possible that whatever destroyed that ship is still out there. I'd prefer to be prepared just in case."

Spock nodded, noting the tense posture that the shrug contrasted. It was sound logic, to be prepared, though he hoped it would be unneeded. Turning turned his attention back to Mr. Scott, they carefully extracted the tapes from their casings. "I'll take these up to the bridge for analysis. Mr. Scott, please see if you can hook the unit's memory banks up to our systems computer."

"Those don't look promising." Kirk said, nodding to the tapes as they walked towards the Turbolift.

Kirk was correct. The tapes were very damaged and the old technology was known to be weak and easily compromised. "Agreed. However, the computer may be able to recover something."

"Jim! Hold the lift!" came a familiar voice from behind them.

Spock bit his lip to keep from sighing. Thankfully he was facing the lift and thus his face was turned from the two men long enough for him to tamp down the reaction and school his face into impassivity.

"Mitchell? Why aren't you on the bridge?" Kirk's tone was more confusion than annoyance. 

Spock had to restrain a surge of irritation as the Beta shift pilot inserted himself between Spock and Kirk when they entered the turbolift. He was still adjusting his uniform and had clearly just left the gym - without a shower. Spock was aware of the long-standing friendship between the captain and the pilot. Jim had attempted a few times to bring the two men together in activities and off duty time, but Spock found that he had no desire to further their acquaintance. He kept his opinions to himself as much as possible and the attempts were coming fewer and farther between, thankfully.

"Running an errand." The obvious lie was said in an off-handed manner and Spock did not bother to correct him, though a shared look made it clear that Mitchell knew that Spock knew and that he would do nothing about it. Smug to a fault, the Commander was. Still, surely the captain could see the evidence of this man's neglect of his duties as well as he could. 

"Were you guys playing chess?"

"After a fashion," Kirk laughed and shot Spock a conspiratorial glance over Mitchell's head. Spock met the look and found the annoyance at Mitchell's interruption was suddenly much less than it had been a moment before and his center of calm more balanced. Realizing this, Spock was amazed how Jim could achieve that in him with just a look. Then the moment passed and the doors opened to the bridge.  
"Screen on," Kirk said, settling himself into his chair while Spock headed to his station and started running the tapes through his scanner. "Bring us out of warp, Mr Mitchell. Hold this position."

"Coming out of warp, sir."

"Spock?"

"Nothing sir. The tapes are completely burnt out. Trying the memory banks."

"Let me know when you have something. Randall, open a channel to all decks."

"Channel open sir."

"Crew of the Enterprise, this is the Captain speaking. The shake down run of the Enterprise was more intense than anyone could have predicted.” He paused, allowing everyone a moment to think of Nero and the loss of Vulcan. “Therefore, for our first assignment, Starfleet has given us something that we all hope to be a bit less stressful. Our instructions are to map this area of the galaxy. We are a good distance from any intergalactic borders and from known hostiles and yet we have come across some indication that a Starfleet vessel has encountered trouble here in the past. We will remain on Yellow Alert until we can ascertain what happened to the U.S.S. Valiant and whether or not it's still a threat. All decks stand by. Kirk out."

Spock glanced up from his station when the turbolift doors opened again. He was less than pleased when Dr. Dehner stepped out onto the bridge and his posture stiffened. Kirk glanced at Spock and also seemed less than pleased or so his tone indicated. "Doctor, the ship is in Yellow Alert status. Non-essential person are not allowed on the bridge."

Dehner just smiled, walking down to stand beside the command chair as if to prove her point. "Monitoring the crew in emergency situations is part of my job Captain. I believe you will find that I have been granted access to every functioning area of the ship in the fulfilling of my assignment." 

Kirk glanced at Spock who reluctantly nodded his confirmation. Kirk rolled his eyes before turning back to the monitor. "Fine, Doctor..but keep out of the way."

"I am capable to conducting myself properly in any situation, Captain," Dr Dehner said coldly, remaining exactly where she was.  
"Talk about a walking freezer unit." Mitchell's stage whisper carried across the entire bridge.

Watching the discontented look pass over the Doctor's face, Spock considered the fact that he might have to adjust his opinion of the Captains old friend. Then again, probably not.

Finally, the data Spock had been waiting for started scrolling across his screen. "Interpolating memory banks, Captain. The Valiant had encountered a magnetic space storm and was being swept in this direction."

Kirk stood, ignoring the doctor completely as he move over toward the science station. He left very little room between them as he leaned to scan through the data. "The old impulse engines weren't strong enough."

Spock nodded, oddly comforted by Kirk's proximity and fighting a momentary urge to glare at Mitchell. "It appears they were swept past this point about a half light year out of the galaxy." He leaned in as the data became harder to decipher. "They were thrown clear, turned, and headed back into the galaxy here." The data became even more disjointed. Finally Spock pushed back, turning to face his captain. "I'm not getting it all. The memory banks are almost as badly burned as the tapes. Sounds like the ship encountered some unknown force. Orders, counter orders, and repeated urgent requests for information from the ship's computer records for anything concerning ESP in human beings."

Kirk blinked at him for a moment. Spock had to admit the last bit had thrown him as well. 

"Extrasensory perception," he mused and then turned. "Doctor Dehner, how are you on ESP?"

Dehner came to stand by Kirk. "In tests I've taken, my ESP rated rather high." 

Spock looked up in shock. Was she flirting with the Captain? Did everyone flirt with Kirk?

Kirk didn't seem to notice. "I'm asking what you know about ESP," he clarified sternly. Feeling somewhat mollified by Kirks lack of response Spock returned his attention to his monitor.

"It is a fact that some people can sense future happenings," Dehner explained. "Read the backs of playing cards and so on, but the ESP capacity is always quite limited in humans compared to many other species. Vulcans in particular have a high ESP rating due to their touch-telepathy."

"Interesting, but I'm not sure how that helps us. Anything else from the memory banks Spock?"

"Severe damage. Seven crewmen dead. No, make that six. One crewman seemed to have recovered. That's when they became interested in extrasensory perception." Spock scanned through a couple more pages. "More than interested, almost frantic about it." Then he paused and looked up. "Sir, it appears that the captain gave an order to destroy his own ship."

Spock and Kirk exchanged a look. Touching him lightly on the shoulder, Kirk went back to his chair. 

"Comments?" he asked.

Kelso turned to face him. "The only fact we have for sure is that the S.S. Valiant was destroyed."

"That's probably the best argument to continue the probe." He looked back up at Spock as he continued. "Other vessels will be heading out here someday and they have to know what they'll be facing." A look that spoke volumes. A nod. "We're leaving the galaxy, Mr. Mitchell. Ahead, warp factor one."

*************************************

"Anything?" Kirk was standing besides Spock again. The third time since the command to move forward.

"Negative, sir. According to the sensors there is nothing out there."

"Then why does it glow?"

Both of them looked up at the monitor that still persistently showed an intense pink glow directly in their path. It had appeared visually almost immediately after they had begun moving forward, but as of yet there was no indication as to what was causing the light.

"There is not enough data to extrapolate any conclusions, captain."

"Speculations?"

Spock gave him a look.

"No, of course..."

Suddenly the sound of the engines, normally a low level hum in the background, grew in volume. Kirk was back at his chair in an instant, hitting the com to Engineering. "Scotty?"

"We're encountering some resistance, captain."

"Spock, what's causing it?"

"Force field of some kind."

"It's getting stronger." Mitchell stated as the sound grew louder. 

Kirk shot him an exasperated look. "Thank you, Mr. Mitchell. Shields up. Spock, what are we dealing with?"

"Deflectors say there's something there, sensors say there isn't." Spock was practically yelling now to be heard. "Density negative. Radiation negative. Energy nega....." A shower of sparks exploded from the end console and Spock's board lit up as damage reports started flooding in from all over the ship.

"Emergency stations." Kirk yelled over the loud speaker. "All decks on fire alert." He turned to Spock. 

"Any radiation? Anything?"

"Negative!"

"The ship can't take the strain, Captain." Scotty yelled up from Engineering. The sound of the engines over the speaker was even louder than what they were dealing with on the bridge.

"Helmsmen, take us out of here." Kirk yelled. 

Spock had only a moment of relief before he was hit. His brain exploded in pain like it was on fire. Something ripped into his defenses reaching into the very heart of him. Years of Vulcan training kicked in and his mental shields began pushing back. This was HIS brain, HIS domain, and nothing entered without permission. The pressure was intense. It was not a conscious mind but more like a force of nature, raging against him like the worst of the thunderstorms that raged across the desert sweeping aside all in its path. Spock pushed back with all his control, holding against the assault. And then as suddenly as it had begun it was over, and everything went black.

************************************

Kirk knew the moment Spock hit the ground. It wasn't the sound, too soft to be heard above the sound of the roaring engines. Something inside of Kirk that always tracked Spock felt him fall and his gut twisted as it registered. Kirk was out of his chair and moving towards his First when Mitchell fell. Something close to panic welled up in Jim. It was the decision he feared the most. Spock, or his ship and crew. In the end, he didn’t have a choice. Kirk was at the helm controls before anyone else had a chance to move. "Bones, get up here!" he yelled at the com as he wrestled to get the ship heading the right direction. 

Damage reports were pouring in, and his people were responding. Quick and efficient, Alpha crew appeared to support Beta as technicians poured in to repair damage. Sulu appeared at his side and Kirk relinquished the controls. Dehner was sitting on the floor, her head in her hands leaning against a crewman. Mitchell was still laying at the side of the helm but he was moving and Chekov was with him. Spock lay motionless on the floor next to his station, his head cradled in Uhura’s lap.

Bones appeared at Jim's side just as he reached Spock. His scanner was out, but Jim couldn't stop himself from checking for a pulse the old fashioned way. He took his first real breath when he found it. He and Uhura exchanged a relieved look.

"He's alive.” Bones confirmed. “What happened?"

It was Dehner who responded. "Something hit me, like an electrical charge."

"Mitchell?" Kirk called out, still reluctant to leave Spock's side. 

"He appears to be in shock," Chekov reported.

"I've got Spock, go do your jobs." Bones encouraged Jim and Uhura gently. McCoy knew his friend well enough to know the best thing for him was to focus on work, his ship and crew. 

Kirk almost smiled. Trust Bones to remind him where his duty lay. He got back to his feet and returned to his chair, but he couldn't help but feel that some part of him stayed right there next to Spock. Uhura also got up and moved to the communications terminal, coordinating damage reports.

"Damage report." Kirk swallowed the tension out of his voice as much as possible. They depended on him to keep focused in a crisis.  
"Main engines are out, sir. We're on emergency power cells. Sensors functioning and full power to the shields restored. Casualties, nine dead.”

Nine dead. Jim's mind reeled. His first mission and already there were nine of his crew dead. His crew. His responsibility. Kirk ran a hand through his hair and then noticed Chekov was sitting there staring at his Beta pilot as though the man had grown a second head. Kirk had seen Chekov in the midst of a crisis before and had never seen him so affected. 

"Gary.... Gary, are you all right?" 

Mitchell sat up with a groan. "I'm a little weak for some reason, Jim, but I feel all right." and then he looked up and Jim caught his breath. His eyes were pure silver.

 

 _Captain's log, Star date 2258.91  
After our aborted attempt to cross over the galaxy border, the ship's condition is critical, heading back on impulse power only. Main engines are burned out; warp drive under repairs. Earth bases which were only days away are now years in the distance. The overriding question is what destroyed the Valiant? They lived through the barrier, just as we have. What happened to them after that? And, in a concern closer to home, what happened to cost me the lives of eight of my crewmembers and left three in questionable condition? Spock is unconscious, Dr. Dehner is recovering and technically, so is Gary Mitchell, but his condition concerns me as much as Spock's. Dr. Dehner concluded through autopsy that the dead crewmen had damage to the neural circuits of their brains...they were essentially burned out. No one knows why Gary's eyes are altered. Despite assurances that he is feeling better than ever, I have a sinking feeling that the Lieutenant is more affected than he realizes. Will Spock be similarly altered when he wakes up? If he wakes up. _

McCoy and Dr. Dehner were arguing about something when Kirk enter sickbay. He caught Bone’s eye but swerved past them to check on Spock. He stood there, staring down at the unconscious Vulcan feeling every bit as lost as when he had been stranded on Delta Vega. Spock had saved him then. Would he be lucky enough to have Spock save him again?

"His vitals are stable, now," McCoy said, joining Jim at Spock's bedside. "My suspicion is he's in a healing trance, given the brain activity and the even balance of all his functions. If so, he should come around in a few more hours."

"I hope so," Jim said with a nod. "I need him," he said, his voice much quieter this time. Without really thinking about it, Kirk reached out and took Spock's hand and for a moment, tried to send feelings of support and concern through the simple touch. He had no idea if Spock could sense it but he wanted to try and let his friend know that he was not alone.

"So," the Captain said, releasing Spock's hand and turning to McCoy, walking with him back to his office, "what do you think about the situation? The crew members affected?"

"Well," piped up Dr. Dehner, "we know the Valiant had been frantically looking into ESP. It is interesting to note that all those affected had very high ESP ratings, Mr. Spock and Mr. Mitchell, the highest. I am unsure why Mr. Spock is unconscious and Gary is not, however."  
"It is possible that Spock's crazy innards reacted differently than the humans.” Bones said. “Whatever it happened, the damage was mostly mental. Spock’s brain wired different than a humans. Might be as simple as that. Whether that difference is a good thing or not is too early to tell.”

Spock had been drifting in the dark, tired and sore. He knew that some time had passed but he felt no urgency to leave this quiet place he had found. Then a warmth spread through him. The touch was familiar as was the mind behind it. He felt the concern as well as the hidden panic. It was time to return. Jim needed him. Bits of conversation started to penetrate his conscious mind as he pulled himself free of the darkness and his lips twitched in delight at the perfect opening Bones had left him. "I am constantly grateful for the differences between Humans and Vulcans, and this is no exception," he said at a sufficient volume for the trio to hear him.

Kirk broke away from the doctors and moved to Spock's bedside. Without hesitation, he slapped Spock's face hard. Spock heard Dr. Dehner gasped as the cleansing pain began pulling him from his healing trance. “Again,” he said. Kirk hit him again.

“What are you doing!” Dr. Dehner demanded as the last of the fog dissipated and Spock opened his eyes. “Thank you, Captain. I believe that will be sufficient. My healing trance has been broken.”

“Your eyes are brown,” Kirk breathed, and collapsed down to sit on the side of the bed next to Spock. Both of them ignored the Psychologist behind Kirk. “Thank god.”

“Captain?” Spock questioned.

“Will someone tell me what is going on!”

Kirk sighed and turned away from staring into Spock’s eyes. “The Vulcan healing trance requires physical pain to dispel. As a doctor, I assumed you knew that.”

“I am a doctor of Psychology not medicine,” Dr. Dehner said primly.

Bones ignored both of them and focused on his patient. "Welcome back, Spock. Can you tell us about what happened?"

"It was very strange, an assault on my mind like nothing I have experienced before. It was intense, forceful but not a presence, more like the power of nature rushing in. A thunderstorm sweeping the desert. I managed to push back against it but the extreme effort caused a great deal of damage to my mental shields. When the attack stopped my mind shut down in order to repair the damage. Most curious. May I, in return, inquire as to your interest in the color of my eyes, Captain?”

“Gary Mitchell, Dr. Dehner here and nine others were also affected. Gary’s eyes changed color as a result of the attack.”

“Fascinating.” Spock pushed himself up. “Dr. Dehner have you experienced any residual effects from the attack?”

“No, none.”

“And the others?”

Spock did not miss the way Kirk’s hands clenched at his sides or the worried look Bones threw at the Captain before he answered. “The others are dead Spock.”

Spock took a moment to process this. “Am I right to assume that everyone affected had a high ESP rating?”

“How did you know that?” Bones demanded.

“It was a logical conclusion based on the information we extracted from the U.S.S. Valiant’s memory banks.”

“Any other logical conclusions you can share?” Kirk prompted.

“Not a present, although I do find it interesting that the one physical symptom we have is traditionally associated with the state of the mind.”  
“Gary’s eyes.” Kirk said, and ran his hands through his hair.

“Indeed. It is my opinion that any further examinations should be focused on Commander Mitchell’s mental state. Dr. Dehner expertise in this area will no doubt prove to be of great value.” Spock did not see fit to mention how this new development also conveniently redirected her attentions away from him. Kirk, however, seemed to have reached the same conclusion he did, and while his voice was steady and professional the private smile he flashed at Spock was almost mischievous. “No doubt, Spock.”

************************************

_Captain's Personal log, Star date 2258.91_

__

__

_This attack that has affected my crew is still mostly a mystery. Dr. Dehner and Spock have recovered but my friend Gary Mitchell - he's a different story. He claims to be better than ever, but his eyes...his eyes. Trying to talk to him, he's changed; is strange and earlier, sounded to me almost threatening._

Kirk hit the pause button, sighing softly. He scrubbed his hand over his face, tired. His finger was poised over the record button when the buzzer on his quarters sounded. 

"Captain," Spock said, entering Kirk's quarters, "If I could have a moment." Spock stood, waiting for Kirk's response.

Nodding, Kirk indicated the chair that Spock normally occupied for their chess games. "What is it, Spock? Have you learned something new?"

"Not exactly, Captain, but there are some interesting things of note," Spock said, choosing his next words carefully. "Something is wrong. There are some strange things happening in association with Mr. Mitchell. Jim," Spock said, leaning forward in his chair, his eyes locked onto Kirk's face. "I know he is your friend and appreciate how difficult this must be for you..."

"Gary didn't ask for any of this to happen to him and if there's a way, I'm gonna help him." Kirk's voice was gruff and cold, then the young man sighed. "I'm sorry Spock. I appreciate your concern but I'm alright. Gary's an old friend, so yeah, I'm gonna try."

"Then I would suggest we convene with the department heads to consider the matter at hand. Dr. McCoy has concluded his tests and Mr. Scott has information you should hear."

Jim sighed, then nodded. "Have everyone meet in briefing room 2 in ten minutes. I'll meet you there."

With a nod, Spock rose to leave but paused when he heard his name. "I really do appreciate it, Spock, that you took the time to come here and make sure I was ok."

Spock didn't know what to say to that, so he simply inclined his head once, hoping his concern was there for Jim to see. Then, he was gone and Kirk pressed the record button once more.

_It looks more and more like my old friend is becoming someone...something that I don't recognize. I hope someone has some answers soon._

Hitting the save button, Kirk ran his hand through his short hair and left his quarters, bound for briefing room 2.

Kirk entered the briefing room and took his seat, looking into the face of each person present before starting the meeting. "Alright, I want to hear everything that we've learned so far. Mr. Spock, let's start with you."

"I have observed Mr. Mitchell, Captain and find his behavior interesting. He is reading at a pace far beyond human ability. I have observed him with a seeming ability to control body functions.

Kirk frowned at that. Now that was disturbing. The Captain looked at Kelso and nodded, trying to offer a reassuring smile.

"I stopped by to see how Gary was doing, sir, on my break," Kelso reported, standing with a metal part in his hand. "He told me to check the starboard impulse packs, that they would blow if we activated them. I thought it was a joke. Well, it didn't make any sense that he'd know, but naturally, I checked out the circuit anyway. I don't know how, but he was right. This point is burned out exactly the way he described it." Kelso handed the part to his Captain and retook his seat. 

Dr. Dehner spoke up, clearly agitated. "I have became very interested in observing Gary, Mister Mitchell. It was extremely fortunate that he realized the problem existed.". 

Spock interrupted. "Our subject is not Gary Mitchell. Our concern is, rather, what he is mutating into."

"I realize, Mr. Spock," Dehner said, her voice sharp and accusatory, "that Vulcans aren't supposed to have feelings but the way you talk about someone who's your crewmate...

"That'll do Doctor," Kirk said, his voice equally cold. No one was going to speak to Spock, or any of his crew in that manner.

Dehner interupted the Captain. " I don't think so, sir. You're just as bad. Gary said that you've been friends since high school, that you requested him personally...

" It is my duty, whether pleasant or unpleasant, to listen to the reports, observations, even speculations, on any subject that might affect the safety of this vessel," the Captain pointed out, this time his voice showing he was clearly in command and expected to be obeyed. "It's my science officer's duty to see I'm provided with that. Go ahead, Mr. Spock."

Spock pinned his gaze on Dehner, observing her closely. He experienced something close to pride to have Kirk defend him so but quickly pushed the emotion away. There was business to attend to and he must concentrate fully on the matters at hand. Finally he spoke. "Have you noted evidence of unusual powers? "

Dehner nodded, though it appeared she did so reluctantly. "He can control certain autonomic reflexes. He reads very fast, retains more than most of us might consider usual." 

"Mr. Scott, would you repeat what you told Spock earlier? He indicated that it was relevant to our situation." 

"Aye, Captain. About an hour ago, the Bridge controls started going crazy. Levers shifting by themselves, buttons being pushed, instrument readings changing." 

"I was watching Mr. Mitchell, Captain," Spock remarked. "I could see Mitchell smiling each time it happened, as if this ship and crew were almost a toy for his amusement. 

" Are they right, Doctor? Has he shown abilities of such magnitude?"

Dr. Dehner nodded slowly but refused to meet Kirk's eyes. "I saw some such indications."

" And you didn't think it worth mentioning?" Kirk's voice sounded angry, though he kept it tightly controlled.

"No one's been hurt, have they?" Dehner flung back at the Captain. "Don't you understand? A mutated superior man could also be a wonderful thing. The forerunner of a new and better kind of human being."

"Report, Mister Sulu," Kirk said, turning from the doctor. 

"Looking at this mathematically," Sulu offered as requested, "Mitchell's ability is increasing geometrically. That is, like having a penny, doubling it every day. In a month, you'll be a millionaire."

Spock added. "In less time than that, he will have attained powers we cannott understand or cope with. Soon we'll be not only useless to him, but actually an annoyance."

Kirk nodded, then looked at the group. "This situation is classified. No discussions with the rest of the crew, please. Thank you for your input."

Spock turned to leave with everyone else, but stopped, allowing the doors to close in front of him. "We will never reach an Earth base with him aboard, Jim. In a very short while, we will be nuisances, or worse, hindrances to be eradicated.

"Recommendations, please, Spock, not vague warnings that may or may not happen." Kirk sighed, rubbing his face as he paced.

"Very well, Captain," Spock responded, his voice returning to Science Officer neutral. "Recommendation one. There's a planet a few light days away from here. It has a lithium cracking station. We may be able to adapt some of its power packs to our engines. It is the only possible way to get Mitchell off this ship."

Spock cringed inwardly when Kirk whirled and looked at him as if he were evil incarnate. "If you mean strand Mitchell there, I won't do it. That station is fully automated. There's not a soul on the whole planet. Even the ore ships call only once every twenty years." It was a struggle for Spock to continue but he had his duty, to Kirk and to this ship.

"Then you have one other choice. Kill Mitchell while you still can." 

"Get out, Spock. Just get out of here."

The agony in Kirk's face was clear to Spock and part of him wished fervently for another solution but he could see none. This was his duty, no matter how much he wished otherwise.

"It is your only other choice, assuming you make it while you still have time."

"Will you try for one moment to imagine doing that to someone who's your friend? We're talking about Gary."

"Jim, I understand you and Gary Mitchell are friends, but you have always allowed him leeway, moreso than others you consider a friend. Why? Help me understand."

Kirk sighed again and sat at the table, his head propped on his hands.

"I met Gary in school, just after Sam left home. He was bold, brash, life of the party...and he took to me kinda like a little brother, even though we were the same age. It wasn't the close friendship like Bones and I have...or the simpatico that you and I do but..." Kirk's voice faded for a long moment, then he continued. "Gary was my first friend, Spock, aside from my brother Sam. Lots of things made it hard for me to make friends and well, he defended me - from bullies, had my back in bar brawls, even stood up to Uncle Frank once or twice. Until I met Bones, Gary was it." Then the Captain's voice did drop off and he did not continue. He scrubbed his face with his hands, not looking at Spock.

Taking the seat next to his friend, Spock spoke quietly to Kirk. "Jim, I do understand how difficult this is for you." Spock put his hand on Jim's shoulder and left it there while he spoke. "If it would help you, relinquish command to me for this task and I will bear this burden for you gladly, but this must be done. The captain of the Valiant probably felt the same way about having to remove his crewmember and he waited too long to make his decision. I think we've both guessed that. 

There was a long stretch of silence. Kirk sat with his face down, his shoulders hunched. Finally, wide, deeply troubled blue eyes looked up and faced Spock. "Thank you, Spock, for the offer, but I need to do this. Set course for the planet."

Spock nodded. He reached for the comm and gave the order, then turned back to Kirk. "How can I help you, Jim?"

"For now, do your job, no matter how difficult I make that to do, Spock. Then," Kirk said, a sad smile on his face, "ask me that question again after this is all over."

***********************************

Spock sat in his meditation robes, his eyes closed as he worked through all that had transpired over the last few days. It had been trying and the worst had been watching Jim suffer and being unable to relieve that suffering. The friendship that had been forged between them in the fires of adversity and a joint enemy had slowly deepened with all of the difficulties the two men had shared. Pain shared was pain halved, it was true, but it was equally true that sometimes, that sharing led to more than simple easing of burdens. Sometimes, it led to a want, a need beyond anything anticipated. Finally, Spock abandoned his meditation and changed from robes to sleep pants. He heard Kirk pacing and talking in his quarters and after some minutes, concluded that he was dictating his log report. Spock's desire to be with Kirk, to reassure himself that he was alive and well, was not logical, but then, lately, not much had been. Spock still embraced and identified with his Vulcan ancestry, but he was also learning about other parts of himself, parts that were also important. His humanity, his passions, his desires. Like his father, he wanted to find love when he replaced his bond. Like Spock, he wanted T'hy'la. Most of all, right at this moment, he wanted to go into that room, gather Jim up into his arms and find some way to make him alright again.

_Captain's Log: Star date 2259.18. We're now leaving Delta Gamma and my friend behind. It's been a very difficult few days for all of us, but especially for me... and Gary Mitchell. The planet is completely uninhabited and slightly smaller than Earth. Desolate, but rich in crystal and minerals. We transported down with a repair party, to find the materials needed to try to regenerate the main engines, save the ship. Our task as well, transport down a man I've known for fifteen years, and if successful, maroon him there._

Jim paused the recorder, standing and dialing up his favorite coffee brew, his body wound tight with days worth of adrenaline and anger and frustration. He paced the office of his quarters like an animal as he struggled to put into words the events on the planet so his report would be complete.

There was no choice, really. Gary proved even before we reached Delta Gamma that he could not or would not control the power he now found himself with. He would have taken over the ship and wreaked havoc across the galaxy. That did not make doing this any easier for me, nor for my crew. Still, once the engines were repaired, we did our duty. Duty, what a simple word for what is sometimes the most difficult thing that you can be asked to do. Mr. Spock was attacked and Mr. Kelso killed in the carrying out of that duty. Add to the official losses, Doctor Elizabeth Dehner. Be it noted she gave her life in performance of her duty. Lieutenant Commander Gary Mitchell, same notation. I want his service record to end that way. He didn't ask for what happened to him. 

Spock stood in the doorway of their shared bathroom and listened to the last of the log message, watching Jim closely. It was clear to Spock that Jim was a bundle of nerves and unspent energy and had seen too much death and loss in too short a period of time. He moved into the room, walking toward where Kirk was still standing. Kirk put down his cup and turned to face his first, looking like he was contemplating running, or attacking his friend. Spock was here to complete his duty and more important, because he wanted to be. "How can I help you, Jim?"

Jim just smiled, a smile that was equal parts sad and feral. He reached out his hand and waited for Spock.

One thing that Spock had decided in his meditation was to take this path wherever it led. While he had not spoken of it to anyone, nor would he until he knew Jim's mind, he knew that he wanted this relationship with his Captain and friend to move forward. How far that would take them he did not know, but he was willing to take this chance. The possible rewards were too great not to. He wanted T'hy'la and he wanted Jim and most of all, he wanted them to be one and the same. Time would tell. For now, though, he was giving all control to Jim and would do whatever his friend needed. Without undue delay, Spock reached out and took the cool hand in his, feeling the tingle of connection when their skin touched. 

"Lights to twenty percent." Kirk's voice said, emotion causing it to be slightly raspy.

Everything about Kirk at this moment was thrilling for Spock. The tension that lay just below the surface, the power he felt in the connection of their joined hands, that slight growl in his voice. 

Jim took Spock's hand and tugged him close, their bodies bumping into each other slightly. 

Spock met his gaze and for a long moment, the two of them simply looked at each other. They were standing so close that Spock felt Jim's breath on his face. Kirk's grip on his hand tightened and before he realized they were moving, he found himself pressed into the empty expanse of wall that separated the living and sleeping quarters . The cool metal behind him matched the coolness of Jim's body as he pressed fully against Spock. 

"I am yours," Spock murmured as he watched Jim's mouth move closer.

"Spock," Jim growled, then his mouth had mine and there was no more talking. He grasped my head, pulling our faces tighter into the frenzy of the kiss. His hands were already on the ties at the waist of my pants, his touch ripping a sound from me that had me gasping into his mouth. The strings gave way as his hand dove in to tug playfully at the crisp curls growing at my groin. "No underwear," he teased.

My cock pushed up, escaping the loose confines of my pants into his hand. He grasped it firmly, hefting it as the loose-fitting pants slid to my ankles. He squeezed and I hardened, moaning again, already past caring at the wantonness of the sound. Clutching his hips, I thrust forward, sucking his tongue into my mouth. 

He surged against me and suddenly I couldn't wait. I needed to touch him, hold him, feel him. I needed him as exposed as I was. His fly practically burst open into my hands and lost his barely held control. Ripping his mouth from mine, he threw back his head and gasped. "Spock!"

Latching my mouth onto his neck, I yanked his pants down his steely flanks before returning to my prize. His bush was pale and soft as my fingers combed through it. Crushing me even harder against his chest, Jim widened his stance, begging me with his body. Wrapping both hands around his cock, I shoved my own into the tight space between his thighs. The sensation of his silky hair against my cock's tender head was excruciating and exhilarating, almost a maddening tickle. I got lost in the rhythm, yanking up on his cock, as I drove myself into him. All the while he held us chest to chest in a desperate stranglehold that made breathing difficult. I was in heaven.

There was a whisper in my ear, and it took me a minute to recognize Jim's guttural cry of "fuck me, fuck me, fuck me...."

There was a time I would have sworn that I could never find such talk exciting. However, I underestimated its power in the proper context. To hear him almost demanding it of me now got me right where I lived. Almost out of control, I violently flipped us, pressing him face first into the wall as I slammed up against him. "Do you want me?" I demanded as I shoved my leaking cock up the crack of his perfect ass. "Are you empty and needy, wanting it so bad you're aching for me?" I whispered right in his ear.

"Spock! Please!"

I will never be able to hear him say my name again without getting hard. I pulled back just enough, just long enough to remove the rest of his clothing so that I had access to all of his body. Then, my fingers began to work their way into his crack and my right index finger found heaven. Never had I anticipated the sensations that I would experience when my hands touched deep inside his body. All of my control was focused simply on not coming. I slipped in, finding slick heat where I was expecting dry. "God, Jim." I sunk my teeth into his shoulder, fighting for control with everything I had. He was ready! For me, or someone. I heard myself growl, a predatory declaration of ownership that I truly did not think I possessed. "Mine! You are mine!" I growled. He was ready for me to fuck him, and by god I was going to do it. His face turned and in the soft light his handsome features became even more so. An ancient Greek god had come down to earth and was standing there offering me everything. There was nothing but desire in his face, and a wanting so big that for a moment I wasn't sure I could fill it. There was no doubt I was going to give it my best effort. "Hold on, Jim," I said, in the most normal voice I had used all evening. 

He nodded, put his head down, and braced himself against the wall on his outstretched arms. Pulling my finger out, I positioned the head of my cock at his opening and pushed forward. His knees buckled, but I just followed him down, my hands clamped on his hips as I slowly invaded him. Completely sheathed we paused. The sound of ragged breathing beat like a heart in our ears as we hovered on the brink of ecstasy. Then, clutching one another, we fell into it.

God, this was different. I didn't fuck Jim as much as ride him. He moved as if electrified as I plunged into him again and again, battering against him as if trying to push us both off the ground and into heaven. I wanted to hold on forever, to spend the rest of eternity in this perfect dance with him in front of me, surrounding me... claiming me. I wanted to stay here until there was no more pain, no more need, just the two of us, together. 

But I couldn't hold it.

Something exploded behind my balls, and I pressed my face into his back, tasting his flesh as I came. Then all thought was gone, as the sensation of ejaculating deep inside him overwhelmed me. I accented each spurt with a savage twist of my hips and found myself thrusting long after I was spent as if I had forgotten how to do anything but fuck him.

At last my body stilled, and I slipped out of him, my cock deliciously raw. I knew I would be feeling him tight around me for awhile. As I took in gulps of air, my spent passion turned into tenderness. My hands circled his waist and I kissed his neck. "Jim?"

It was only then that I noticed that his breathing hadn't slowed and his body still trembled beneath my hands. I backed away and leaned against the opposite wall of the doorway. Jim was still spread-eagle against the wall, his back heaving. I called his name again and he turned toward me. The first thing that caught the light was the rigid shaft of his cock, so engorged it actually jerked with each beat of his heart. The second thing that caught the light was his face ... and a wicked, wicked smile that transformed his features into those of the devil himself.

Jim was on me before I could let out even a squeak of surprise. He stood, yanked me up and we tumbled onto the bed. I tried to say something... anything, but his lips silenced mine. His body was heavy on top of me, and I could feel the heat and insistent pressure of his cock between our bodies. For a split second I panicked under the pressure but then my eyes locked with his and I remembered that this wasn't a stranger. This was my Captain, my friend; a man I trusted with my life.

My eyes closed and I just let go.

My knees were pulled up to my chest and I was well and truly trapped beneath him. Something pressed against the opening of my ass. At first I thought it was a finger until the sheer girth of it became apparent. My eyes flew open again in panic but he just smiled down at me. "Trust me." Using my controls, I ordered my body to relax, nodding to Jim the go ahead.

Jim's hands were braced on my shoulders as his cock slowly worked its way into me. Suddenly I was hungry to have him inside me and the small twinges of pain were nothing next to the great hole inside that needed to be filled right now. I writhed to accommodate him, but pinned as I was, there was nothing I could do to speed the process. 

His cock crept into me with the stealth of an assassin, and I was powerless against its advance. At last I gave up all movement and lay still. An eternity later the solid brace of his pelvis pressed up against my backside and I knew he had reached his limit. His cock flexed inside of me and I reveled in the fullness of it.

Just as slowly as it had entered, Jim's cock began to retreat, leaving a void as it withdrew. I moaned my distress and his hot mouth claimed mine to taste the sound. When he slipped free I gave a cry and he chuckled into my mouth before his tongue dove in, just as his cock drove into my body. He fell into a rhythm, his tongue and cock working together to fuck me from both ends.

My own erection renewed, faster than it ever had before. Still wet with my earlier release, it slipped easily between our bodies. I tried to reach down and grab it, but Jim quickly pinned both my arms over my head.

I think the pent up stress and Jim's natural stamina could have kept him going until dawn at that excruciating pace, but as if cued from some external source he began to increase the tempo of his thrusts. I couldn't help, I couldn't move, all I could do was lie there and feel the intoxicating sensations building inside of me. 

Sheer force of will lifted my hand toward Jim's face, but I hesitated, wanting permission. The kiss broke for a breath and he saw my hand, waiting and looking into my eyes, nodded once. As my fingers touched his face, his mouth reclaimed mine and passion and heat exploded between us. The meld was light but our minds grabbed each other at first touch and everything multiplied almost beyond bearing.

With each thrust, the friction of his skin sent a thrill through my cock, as his tongue slid in my mouth and his cock pounded into my prostate. I lost track of what was mental and what was physical, but somewhere, I was moaning and crying into him and he consumed it all with a rumble of satisfaction deep in his chest. Orgasm hit me like a tidal wave. Jim cried out, thrusting deeper. I felt my bowels fill with his heat. He hovered above me, trembling, neither moving nor speaking until his softened cock was expelled from my body.

It appeared that this had indeed achieved what was needed, as the tension and anxiety seemed to drain from Jim's face and body. Seeing this, I did not give in to my instincts of deep thought and reason. Rather, I took my counterpart's advice and did what felt right. I wrapped my arms around Jim, lowered my legs and pulled him to my chest until he settled on top of me, cradled between my thighs. As he relaxed into that space, we were messy, exhausted and I, for one, had never been happier.

"Spock," Jim started to say, his voice slurry with exhaustion. "'mm heavy."

"Shhh," I responded in a soft voice. "Rest, Jim. You are precisely where I want you to be."

Jim placed a tender kiss on my neck, then snuggled into the embrace.

I toed the blanket up and over us both, then caressed the hard, relaxed body at my leisure. There would be time to talk, later. For now, I wanted to sleep with Jim in my arms.


End file.
